This means that when we make a wrong choice, we can repent and feel peace and happiness again. But me and her have broke the law of chasity 3 times. I had spoken with my Bishop and Stake President,they seem to be confuse as I am How do i know that the Lord forgave me? Would you have to go start over and go that certain amount of months again? Be her partner. But scence then everything has been pointing me to go. How do I learn to keep myself from masturbating as well as swearing like a drunken sailor that Gordon B. Hinckley cautioned? May God bless you in your preparation for a mission and for eternal life. And did it again, but moved wards because of a move with homes. Sometimes, Ive wondered if Ill ever be able to go on a mission. How do these couples go from ecstatic levels of love and happiness to frequent conflict, bitterness, and in many cases, divorce? No one can ever be forgiven of any transgression until there is repentance, and one has not repented until he has bared his soul and admitted his intentions and weaknesses without excuses or rationalizations. And all who meet you need to know what a true disciple of the Lord looks like and acts like. May we be willing to take responsibility for our own sins and weaknesses that create stress and pain in our marriages. The past four years have been spiraling out of control. God is always there and will always be there for you!! Be prayerful, drink deeply from the scriptures, and I know that through the power of God you will be able to overcome it and be able to return to live with your Father in Heaven in Celestial glory. Instead, it's a gift that you can feel. For teachers: Writing a list can generate interest and help learners focus their attention. Your bishop is the one who determines that. Audrey, I encourage you both to go talk to your bishops separately. What happens is this situation? As far as I know, there is no mandatory repentance time for masturbation. He is eligible to return to the mission field in 1 year. Im glad to hear you have been researching the LDS Church. I appreciate the sensitivity in which you address your commenters. You may have already confessed to Heavenly Father and He may have already forgiven you, yet I still think that with the serious nature of these transgressions, you should talk it over with your bishop. But whether or not you have committed serious transgressions, like serious violations of thelaw of chastity, we all make mistakes and need to utilize the repentance process. It's about 1 he 40 minutes from hitting the button to the end but the time it takes doing the veil varies according to how many patrons there are. I really dont have anyone to talk to anymore about this problem because the only person I trusted not to run their mouth about it was my bishop and he just got called to another position as 1st counselor in the stake presidency. We are Their servants. It never involved masturbation, if that makes a difference. Good luck and God bless. There are situations where forgiveness does not mean staying in a relationship that is abusive or dangerous. I am afraid that I will meet the same fate as my father and be desensitized to the evils of the world, and I dont know what will happen to my father in the afterlife if he is too stubborn to repent and come back even though he remarried to a non-LDS person. about two years ago, I began indulging in inappropriate activities because I had completely lost faith in the church and had no remorse. So great had been my iniquities, that the very thought of coming into the presence of my God did rack my soul with inexpressible horror. Brethren, your first and foremost duty as a bearer of the priesthood is to love and care for your wife. The teachings of Christ, particularly in 3 Nephi and the Sermon on the Mount, direct us to improve our hearts. Researchers have identified a number of reasons, but in my professional experience, I have found that most of these explanations boil down to two fundamental factors: a lack of repentance and a lack of forgiveness. Seek to understand the atonement and to follow the example of Jesus Christ in all you do in life. Kate, It may be possible for the two of you to still go on a mission, but its going to be a long road back. As you do these things, you will be able to gain strength beyond your own to fight and conquer these temptations. It is motivated by love for God and the sincere desire to obey His commandments. In the Old Testament, two Hebrew words help us understand repentance. What can we do so we can marry in the temple. After repenting and waiting the year can I serve when I turn 19? Good luck, and may God bless and be with you. I just need some advice on what to do and get my life back on track. Get on your knees and pray each morning for strength beyond your own to resist sexual temptation. Before i turned 15 i would repent at night during my prayer and mansturbate the next morning. I was struggling with pornography for a few years from the ages of 12-16 but got over it. Hi jimmy. But there are a lot of factors involved, so the precise length of time is something that your bishop will decide. Of course I have sinned in the past, but made my confessions to the church priests when I did. "Yes, we will make mistakes. Answer. Well, for one, it sounds like you may have more of a testimony than you even realize. Our sincere sorrow should lead us to forsake (stop) our sins. Please be open and honest with him and Im sure he will help you get ready and leave on a mission as soon as possible. If I am going to tell that Im watching porn to my bishop, am gonna tell what type or kind (homosexual porn) or simply telling I am watching porn? Its been 3 years and I want to go on a mission in 4 years. I know it will be hard but with the Saviors help, you can overcome these things, and receive all the promised blessings from your Heavenly Father. He is a convert and he thinks he just need to be good with the lord, how can I make him understand we need to talk with the bishop? If the Holy Spirit is prompting you to talk to the bishop about it, then you definitely should. It could be a month. Ultimately, your spiritual cleanliness and worthiness is between you and the Lord. Any advice so I can have spirit with me and I never struggle with it again? Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the Lord thy God, he it is that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee. Deut 31:6. A vital part of repentance is to forgive those who have sinned against us. Upon reflection of their past actions, though, they realize they havecommitted serious sins that need to be cleared up, so they can be worthy to go. If we do not fully understand the word 'repent', then we cannot form the close and lasting relationship that God requires of us. Second, know that the battle against Satan is real, and when you go into battle each day, you should prepare yourself just like when the Nephites. He will understand your difficult situation and help you through it. I have previously been on probation for participating in sexual activities with my ex as well as breaking the word of wisdom. When we repent, our life changes. Your decision to go talk to your bishop is right on. And the Lord is not afraid of logic and reason either. Jeffery, Youll probably want to have a sit down meeting with your bishop to clarify everything, including the time table of when you last slipped into these transgressions. Am I still eligible to go? I had wonderful people come into my office devastated because they had been terribly hurt by the actions of their spouse. Our sin must become a burden, a weight,. It gets worse. Godly sorrow is different than worldly sorrow. A suffocating boot has been placed upon his throat. Im proud of you for having the courage to go talk to him. Apparently there is a policy (not doctrine) that says when a line is crossed, this punishment (a one year waiting period) must be exacted. If it is something where I would need to wait a year, I would rather not ask or tell anyone I had the idea and I would stop considering it in the mean time. We must first feel dirty inside if we are to seek God for cleansing. A few weeks ago I tried smoking marijuana for the first time and I have used it twice since then. If masturbation is a problem you have had in the past, but it has been many months since youve had a problem with it, you may not need to confess it. So Ive been clean for 9 months, all the while praying and doing all I said above^, Opal, The LDS Church Handbook for bishops and stake presidents says that a person who has been guilty of serious violation of the law of chastity must repent before they can receive a temple recommend. Whether or not you talk to your bishop about this is something between you and the Lord. I dont remember things but somehow I still feel the quilt. The Blessings of Repentance. As for your concerns about what others will think of your, I will remind you that the Lord told Joseph Smith on multiple occasions, fear not what man can do (D&C 122:9, see also Moroni 8:16 and D&C 3:7). How long does it take to convert to LDS? The adversary is quadrupling his efforts to disrupt testimonies and impede the work of the Lord. MOSES 6-7 in the Pearl of Great Price. I know you dont want your parents or friends at church to be disappointed in you, but remember that what God thinks is more important than what other people think of you. Do I have any chance of returning to the field? Maedros. There are specific ways in which we can likely improve. Hey ,i wanna know that has i have broken the law of chastity and next year January can I go on a mission? To become free from it, we must turn to our Heavenly Father, pray in faith, and act as He asks us to. Since you recently moved, perhaps this is a good time to start fresh with a new life and leave your sinful past life behind you. Im losing my hope of marrying in the temple because of the sin I committed and what my teacher told us? But I was on Facebook earlier (on an LDS moms page) and they were having a conversation which included masturbation, I honestly had no clue about masturbation being against the law of chastity and now I feel awful and disgusting. I really want to go, Ive also been afraid of accepting the oath and covenant of the priesthood, because if someone breaks the oath and covenant there is absolutely no forgiveness in this life, or in the next. Through their tears they would ask, Bishop, how can I ever forgive my spouse? We would then talk about the Atonement and its ability to heal broken hearts and to give us the ability to forgive. By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sinsbehold, he will confess them and forsake them.. The battle against Satan is real. Understand that you do not have to love him in order to be Christ-like. But what if we cant simply forgive, forget, and move on? I really want to serve a mission and Im about to turn 19. It does seem like a confusing situation. First it started with porn then when I started dating I did everything I shouldnt have. Good luck and God bless. He knows you better than anyone else does, he created you, he knows Satan and You and he knows you can succeed!! The mindset of How many drops of blood were for me? is incorrect and focuses more on the COST of the atonement than the actual GIFT that was freely given. I am sorry for what I did and I dont think I can wait a year and still want to go on a mission. No bishop and none of your friends and family who truly know you, will think ill of you because you are working towards full repentance. That was a blessing that Elder Cook says will continue to benefit families . I wanna be honest with you, that I cannot remember some of the things that happened including, when was it and how that was happened. Remember the words of King Benjamin from the Book of Mormon: I would desire that ye should consider on the blessed and happy state of those that keep the commandments of God. I hope you mentioned this to your bishop. So, is masturbation considered a serious sin? What about breaking the Law of Chastity as an Non-Member who is preparing for Baptism? After We Repent, We Need to Let Go and Trust God. Do I still really need to confess to my bishop about it or would it be okay if Ill keep this between me and the Lord and continue myself in righteousness? so it may be your weakness because you will learn best from it how to be Christlike and have the courage, confidence and strength to over come Satan in this and other aspects of life. The privilege of repenting is made possible through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Sara, I congratulate you on your desire to serve the Lord. Using will power to effect change in life is often not effective. 2. my family has been members of the church my whole life. He is asking us to change the way we love, think, serve, spend our time, treat our wives, teach our children, and even care for our bodies. If you have a need to repent because of the way you have treated the women closest to you, begin now. Gratefully, the priesthood we hold is far stronger than are the wiles of the adversary. He has No pity nor empathy for you. Now, I ask you, brethren, are you more interested in dressing and grooming your body to appeal to the world than to please God? If you are unsure about it, talk to your bishop. and when you think youve done all you can and cant do more, push yourself to do more! I am currently away from home and my ward. As hard as it will be, you need to talk to your bishop right away about this situation. Confessing these things to your bishop is part of the process the Lord has given us to be forgiven of our sins and become clean. There is a process in. I finished my probation and later I broke the LOC. But never forget Satan and that hes out to destroy you and so are his followers. For myself, the people I love, and for what Ive done to make the savior suffer. How could they make judgments on his heart? As for breaking up or keeping your relationship, usually priesthood leaders dont tell us specifically who we should date, only that we should date people of our same high moral standards. While God might forget the sins, the Church has a long memory. It could be a year. I break the Law of Chastity but is starting my Process of Repentance. He knows about my precious sins, but just not that I slipped again. Ive since realized how terrible of a decision it has been and I regret everything. You mentioned red flags and that you let yourself get into the situation, which tells me that perhaps, in retrospect, you realize that the Lord was warning you through the Holy Ghost to avoid the situation with the young man. Helga, The answer to your question is that it depends. But I also didnt do anything to stop him either. The battle with sin is real. I kind of pushed it away from my mind. Whether or not you can serve a mission, keep yourself worthy before the Lord and he will bless you now and forever. Oh and I forgot to mention: I stopped this sin 9 months ago. There is no mention in the new handbook just released. Except for Jesus Christ, who lived a perfect life, everyone who has lived upon the earth has sinned. Resentment is one of the worst poisons in marriage. I suggest being completely open and honest with your bishop. The priesthood leaders I have known generally have felt that a month, maybe two or three, of refraining from masturbating would be necessary repentance for that transgression. Thanks. Preparing for a mission and want to go in 5 months. When couples get married, they joyfully anticipate the prospect of spending eternity together. I bless you to become those men. Elder JoeJ. Christensen, an emeritus member of the Quorum of the Seventy, said, To develop a solid marriage, we must be able to admit we are sorry for mistakes we make. He will help and support you and he has the keys of discernment to know the will of the Lord regarding the repentance process. A waiting period of a specific length is not required by the Church for the sin of looking at pornography. In what ways do you think godly sorrow is different from expressions of regret? Follow their counsel and hopefully, you will be able to return to the mission field soon. All of salvation, including repentance and faith, is a result of God drawing us, opening our eyes, and changing our hearts. Im glad you want to be a missionary. John described sin as all unrighteousness (1John 5:17) and the transgression of the law (1John 3:4). It might take several years depending on the severity of your transgressions and your current repentance. Its hard for me to say since I am not your priesthood leader, so this is my opinion, but I think simply stating that you masturbated is enough detail on that matter. Nevertheless, it sounds to me like the Spirit of God is urging you to go talk to the bishop again, so I always encourage people to follow those promptings. Adam's grandson Enos had fled with "the residue of the people . That means you have more power than he does and never ever feel sorrow or pity for him. When repenting to the Bishop, if I am 18 years old do I need to tell my parents the sin if it is more serious such as the Law of Chastity or can I keep it between the Bishop and I? Now dont misunderstand. But, I am very much afraid of confessing to the bishop since my dad is his councelor. If we allow Him to help us sincerely repent and freely forgive, our lives and our marriages will be blessed throughout eternity. Arent individuals different? -If you ever participated in an abortion. For example, a thief should give back what he has stolen. Ive even fasted for forgiveness, and I dont usually fast for medical reasons. I want to serve a mission, but know this sin from a couple months ago is holding me back. We must kneel before Him in humble prayer, acknowledging our sins. He needs men who are determined to keep themselves sexually pureworthy men who can be called upon at a moments notice to give blessings with pure hearts, clean minds, and willing hands. I just really want to serve a mission now and I feel terrible about these sins. I appreciate your candidness. Just wondering how long it is before I can take it again. It has ruined my life to the point that I couldnt go on a mission or attend Brigham Young University-Idaho (I actually attended but dropped out) because every time I tried to go to the bishop for an ecclesiastical endorsement, he denied it because of this gross sin that needs to be resolved. What you tell the bishop he will definitely keep confidential, though he may encourage you to talk to your parents about the situation if he thinks they should know and could help. A few months ago my mom was talking to me about surving my mission and whether or not I want to go, that it was my decision. A person simply cannot properly serve the Lord when they have a serious, unresolved sin in their life. We both wish to focus on prepping for our missions and said to stop dating but wait until we have fulfilled our goals but after everything I have done, am I able to serve my mission? We also know what will hinder our progresswhat we need to stop doing to increase our access to the powers of heaven. This is something I have wondered for a long time but never researched. What effects do our sins have on us? Will my process be long or will I be excommunicated? Just please help me. So please call him and make an appointment to see him right away. Recently I have found myself drawn to the Lords instruction given through the Prophet Joseph Smith: Say nothing but repentance unto this generation.1 This declaration is often repeated throughout scripture.2 It prompts an obvious question: Does everyone need to repent? The answer is yes. Have courage and dont get down on yourself. While these sins are very serious, full repentance is possible. Satan and his devils are trying to persuade us to make bad choices. "Please do not fear or delay repenting." President Nelson cautioned that returning to the covenant path through repentance is not easy. Hello, I really need your help or at least some good advive and answer to my questions. What is the best thing for me to do? Although I never really gained my own testimony of the gospel. Sins slow our spiritual progression and can even stop it. He may want you to wait a month or two to make sure you have overcome the trials and temptations you mentioned, but it shouldnt be much longer than that. Or is it too late for me? Isnt repentance between God (the Bishop as His representative) and the individual? I feel like I have let Heavenly Father down and broken my promises that I made in baptism. If you did not do that, perhaps that is why your former transgressions continue to bother you. He often spoke of the need for us to repent. I just dont feel comfortable. Like you said, a full-time mission will be an amazing event in your life, and bless you throughout your future. I broke it off with her a week ago because the temptations were too strong when I was around her. Good luck and God bless. As we repent, we continually improve ourselves. Thats wonderful that you have a desire to serve a mission. The scriptures tell us, All those who humble themselves before God, and desire to be baptized, and come forth with broken hearts and contrite spirits, and have truly repented of all their sins shall be received by baptism into his church (D&C 20:37). May God bless and be with you. Everyone in my church looks up to me and I dont want them to see me not taking the sacrament and think differently of me. He chafes at the fact that his premortal apostasy permanently disqualifies him from this privilege, leaving him in a constant state of jealousy and resentment. They often enjoy having long conversations, going for walks, and spending time together. Just like when the Nephites went to battle against the Lamanites and prepared themselves with defensive armor, you must be prepared to defend yourself from Satans temptations each day. Hi, so I converted to the church 2 years ago and have been living and doing everything to the best of my ability, I stopped drinking alcohol and coffee the moment the missionaries told me and I havent had sex for about 4 years now. Hi. Aut I was ignorant of the red flags and since then, I have been much more careful to not allow myself to get into that kind of situation again. Brethren, we all need to repent. Hi so when I was 12 I was sucked into the addiction of pornography for 5 months, I knew it was bad but I didnt understand how bad. Stephen, I applaud your righteous desires to repent and serve a mission. You will, of course, need to talk to your bishop to determine if he, as the Lords representative, feels you are worthy and able to serve a mission. It is something I need to discuss with a bishop, I know that. God loves you and needs you. Good luck with your mission prep and well pray for you to resolve these issues quickly and completely so you can be in the full-time missionary force soon. If its true that you have had no issues with pornography for four months, then I dont think it will effect your ability to serve a mission next year. Charlotte, The sacrament is a sacred ordinance and it should be partaken of worthily. No one can repent unless God grants repentance. I know my bishop is the only one who can give me a difiinitve answer on that but Im curious for an estimate. If we have stolen something, we will steal no more. What does repentance entail? i have been breaking the law of chastity for sometime and i have come to realized that it is a grievance sin. my partner in crime wants to marry me in two years from now. BoydK. Packer, The Balm of Gilead, New Era, Aug. 1979, 39. We must restore as far as possible all that has been damaged by our actions, whether that is someones property or someones good reputation. After all, even keeping the sins and weakness on your mind allows Satan to have some hook in you. He knows you well enough that he can likely guess what youre thinking or what youll do next and he knows your patterns. I have a couple of thoughts in response to your situation. Annalisa, Im so sorry to hear about the situation. Youre Heavenly Father loves you and has provided the way for you to change and improve through the Atonement of His Son Jesus Christ. It is a change of mind and heart that gives us a fresh view about God, about ourselves, and about the world. It is not my place to say that you must confess it to your bishop, it just sounds like it would put your mind at ease. When I go to the MTC and confess, will they send me back home? It has been such a negative experience, and I know I will never do something so awful again. Missionary work will be good for you. No sooner. Dalin, Thanks so much for reaching out and sharing your thoughts and feelings. Nothing is more liberating, more ennobling, or more crucial to our individual progression than is a regular, daily focus on repentance. Ezra Taft Benson, Beware of Pride, Ensign, May 1989, 67. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, our Father in Heaven has provided the only way for us to be forgiven of our sins (see Forgiveness). Hey Jimmy Repentance makes it possible for us to grow and develop spiritually again. In order to be forgiven, we must first acknowledge within ourselves that we have sinned. My dear brethren, you were chosen by our Father to come to earth at this crucial time because of your premortal spiritual valor. Josiah, Im sorry about what happened. The Lord has declared that no unclean thing can inherit the kingdom of heaven (Alma 11:37). This will bless you throughout your life and will help you become clean and worthy before God. The last thing you would want is nagging feelings about whether or not your repentance is complete. I know I can do better, and fully intend to never slip up again. Repentance is for our eternal happiness, and we should feel joy as we willingly repent of our sins. However, since this was several years ago (I am now 18) and something that I feel forgiven for and have left completely in the past, do I still need to talk to my bishop? For behold, they are blessed in all things, both temporal and spiritual; and if they hold out faithful to the end they are received into heaven, that thereby they may dwell with God in a state of never-ending happiness. (Mosiah 2:41) Good luck and God bless. May God bless and be with you. I feel like He is trying to teach me something and I cannot figure out what that is. However, I feel very good with where I am at, and I want to worthy to serve a mission this next year. In that meeting, be sure to tell your stake president what has happened. Please be completely open and honest with him and tell him of all these transgressions so you can begin the process of repenting and putting these things behind you. We didnt have sex, but we definitely broke the law of chastity. I got baptized when I was 15 and first had relations when I was already a member. But again, it sounds to me like nothing occurred which would delay you from serving a mission. Am afraid to talk it out to my bishop and i dont know. Enoch and his city of Zion are powerful symbols among the Latter-day Saints, affirming that supreme righteousness can be attained on earth as it is in heaven. There needs to be evidence that you are truly sorry that you have hurt or offended your spouse and that you take responsibility for your mistake or offense. My sin is pretty grievous with the law of chastity. Repentance sometimes requires great courage, much strength, many tears, unceasing prayers, and untiring efforts to live the commandments of the Lord. And Im sorry if I shared to much for this page. At times, we should fast for special blessings. I plead with you to be the men and young men the Lord needs you to be. You can start by telling him the generalities of what happened, and he will ask for additional details as he considers them relevant. JoeJ. Christensen, One Step at a Time: Building a Better Marriage, Family, and You, 39. 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